Hapbirsement – (hap birs ment) n. that awkward moment you have while sitting there at your birthday party in silence while everyone sings “Happy Birthday to You”.
Surprise parties can be fun for most people, lots of colourful party favours, balloons, noisemakers, and silly hats puts everyone in a great mood. There will be games, soda, punch, and most of all sweets. If this is your birthday that is being celebrated and you are over the age of 12, then you might come across a feeling of hapbirsement.
In the time it takes to sing the one and only verse of this silly song, you will feel yourself wanting to grow smaller and smaller, especially if the cake set in front of you has gotten bigger and the candles brighter and more numerous over the years. You know everyone is here to celebrate with you and make merry with all kinds of sugar-rushing goodies, and if you are lucky, someone might bring beer or fruity malt beverages to wash them all down with. Nothing cures hapbirsement quicker than access to fermented drinks and the end of that silly song. The one saving grace you have from hapbirsement is the fact that someone else you know will be suffering from it in the near future.