Gyroped (jy’roh ped) – n. A kid who cannot resist spinning around on a diner stool.
With summer vacations comes many stops at coffeeshops and diners along the interstates, and with those stops comes the possibility that your kid or kids, or that you might run into someone’s kids that have become gyropeds. These kids just can’t wait to get to that big theme park the parents might be heading to for the vacation. they are going to make their own spinning teacup ride, right there in the Waffle House or Steak and Shake. They can pick up some real speed, too, but after some time, the gyroped either becomes an annoyance to the other diners or to the staff of the casual restaurant, and then the fun is all over. The ride stops, usually followed by a sharp rap on the behind by Mom or Dad, a yelp and squeal, and some blubbering as the gyroped tries to catch his or her breath after getting their discipline. This may or may not deter the overly excited kid that is still heading to that summer vacation park down the road. Sometimes, a few gyropeds can be found in the same coffeeshop, and they will synchronize their spinning. If you ever do see this, make sure to capture the video and send it to YouTube.