Piranha (2010) A Truly Horrible Motion Picture

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This is not your Rodger Corman’s Piranha, oh no, that one was tame compared to this and not in a good way either. This film is so gimmicky it isn’t even funny, though it does make the film comedic in placed, but just barely. The makers of this film just want to gross you out and that is just about all except to give young men and teens hard-ons.

Piranha stars Elisabeth Shue, Jerry O’Connell, Steven R. McQueen and is directed by Alexandre Aja, best known for The Hills Have Eyes. That in itself explains a lot about this film. We also have special appearances by Richard Dreyfuss as the fisherman Matt Boyd, I think just to try and tie it into the film of the same name from the ’70s. The 2 films share a similar plot, both on a resort town, both on a lake, though the earlier one was more a river, and both have people turned into bite sized pieces. That is where the similarities stop.

Its spring break and a porn company is doing some filming in the local waters, so they get a local to help them out. The local, Jake played by Steven R. McQueen, takes them out and all bloody hell breaks loose. The day before there was an under lake earthquake that opened it up to another lake under it with thousands of hungry fish, not just any fish, these are prehistoric piranha and they just love eating anything other then themselves. See the movie you will see what I mean, but why bother seeing it since it is just a gods awful blood mess in more ways then one. The 3D gimmicks are awful, the blood too red and the special effects should be called special in a bad way.

If you are looking for a quality film this isn’t the one to go see. You would be better off seeing The Cave or some other blood feast then this waste of film. Heck, they didn’t even finish it. At least with the first film of the same name they found a way to get rid of the fish, this one just falls flat and leaves you there. It doesn’t even give you the satisfaction of an ending like Matrix II did. It just quite, it’s like they just gave up, no real climax at all. If I could have gotten my money back I would have before even getting halfway through this film. Its gross, degrading and who wants to see fake foamy throw-up hitting the screen in 3D no less.

If you have no taste at all then go see this film. If you do have some dignity and taste and appreciation for what a horror film is supposed to be then see something else. This film makes all other bad horror films look good. This film is even worse then Saw.

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