Furbling – v. Having to wander through a maze of ropes at an airport or bank even when you are the only person in line.
This sniglet is so commonly used by my household that I was surprised that I hadn’t used it here on Musings yet. Furbling is commonly used in airports and banks, true, but you will never do so much furbling as you will do when visiting a theme park, especially if you are one of those park guests that go very early or stay very late. You will encounter furbling at rollercoasters and thrill rides, kiddie rides and park transportation rides. Anywhere that you might be parking your tuckus temporarily on a mobile seat made of hard plastic or wood, you will find yourself furbling, unless you are hitting that ride at a peak hour, then furbling becomes nonexistant. It is those times when you really wish you could be furbling again, but during those peak hours, perhaps it is best go see shows, or just leave the park to find food that won’t kill your credit cards, and just tends to taste better. Now is the time to take your vacay and hit those Southern parks, because once the Northern Park season gets into swing, you may soon find yourself furbling again.
BOVILEXIA (bo vil eks’ e uh) n. The uncontrollable urge to lean out the car window and yell “Moo!!” every time you pass a cow.
We don’t know why we do it, but maybe it’s to see if those animals will respond. Maybe we do it because country roads trips can tend to be boring if we don’t have some kind of electronic diversion with us. It’s not so bad when driving through areas that have hills or mountains, because there, the Earth itself can be majestic and fascinating, but for those long stretches of flat heartland…. well, that’s where it seems that bovilexia kicks in. A version of bovilexia can be used in suburban areas as well, when one sees a domestic pet on the streets, bark or meow, and watch the animal’s reaction as you drive by. Would those be called canilexia or felilexia? Animals are natures clowns, and we do find them to be pretty funny, but sometimes they find us to be pretty silly, too. Can you actually get through a road trip without succumbing to bovilexia? Leave the gaming devices and portable DVD players packed away and see if you can handle this experiment. Your car companions might find your fidgeting to be unusual, but it would be interesting to see which one of them gives into bovilexia first.
Sharpict (shahr-pict) n. A person addicted to smelling Sharpies.
By now, many of us have gone back to work, and some maybe back to school after the holiday break, and we are constantly surrounded by hordes of office supplies. This is a paradise to the sharpict. To them, there is nothing like the scent of a Sharpie laundry marker. Those whom are sharpicts know that there is much more to these than merely writing on t-shirts. Then again, just about any permanent marker has a scent that most of us just can’t get enough of. Some hardbound books have that newly printed ink scent that can last for years, even decades, and let’s not even go there with those retro mimeographed quizzes we took in math class. The scent of newly tumbled test sheets was so lovely, that it was amazing that we could concentrate on those equations. Newly photocopied test sheets just aren’t the same, and if you were the teacher’s aide that was lucky enough to help out while she made those ditto sheets, you’d be in a chemical heaven all afternoon. Now, Sharpies are not the same as newly bound books or ditto sheets, but they still have a scent that most everyone loves. Sometimes we wonder why a trip to a local office supply store seems so satisfying and fascinating. Now we know, but this also leaves us to wonder if the staff working at these stores get the same inky chemical rush all day long that we encounter in the short time that we are there.
Aeroma (ayr oh’ ma) – n. The odor emanating from an exercise room after an aerobics workout.
So, it’s the third day of a new year, and many Musings readers are most likely working on their New Years resolutions to eat healthier and get more fit. Some of us might have loftier ideas, like to plan ahead, or to become more charismatic, but for those whom are sticking to the basics, you are most likely going to end up going to a gym or fitness centre someday within the fortnight, and you may encounter an aeroma. You could be passing by it, or even be part of the crowd creating it, but no matter what, this vaporous amoeba of odor will engulf your olfactory nerves in such a manner that you might consider rethinking those basic fitness plans for the new year, and try for something a bit more adventurous or cerebral. Outdoor hiking might create the same scent, but at least it won’t be contained into one compact space. Another great thing about outdoors workouts is the fact that there are plenty of other scents to mask the aeroma, like woods, flowers, animals, chemical pollutants, etc. So, good luck with those plans, and let us know how they work out for ya.
itard (i-tard): somone who is using an iphone and has no idea how to operate the device.
I’m one of those odd people in America that don’t own an i-phone or i-pod, or even knows who iCarly is. I’ve lived on this planet for forty-seven years now, and I go through over thirty-five of them not having to have these little bits of electronic addiction. I suppose if I ever had a reason to obtain an i-whatever, I might be an i-tard for a few days, because even on the commercials, those things look pretty confusing to me. I don’t know if Musings readers will find this fact about me a bit odd, old-fashioned, or just a little too bohemian, but I’m sure that I am not the only one of us out there that doesn’t own one of these i-thingies. If we do get lucky or cursed, and find ourselves in the possession of one of these items, please don’t judge us too harshly when we can’t figure it out right away. We got through the Big 80s and the Naughty 90s. This is the generation that doomed to work with microchips without being trained on them since the first Tron movie came out. We got this. Read more...(234 words, 1 image, estimated 56 secs reading time)